silent at times..

silent at times.., a photo by dumbolic on Flickr.

The human heart is like a ship on a stormy sea.

Living like *this*

He find himself as a wrong person

Who failed to estimate life,

to recognize things around him

and unable to understand himself.

As the days passed by,

everything seems to be a dream.

A dream he failed to fulfill

with the life he had.

He was avoided by happiness

and sadness welcomed hm.

No space for entertainment

and everything was dark.

I'm in love with reality.

Some of my friends said I've changed a lot .
I don't know what to say about that.
So I started to think all time, "What influenced me??".
At last I found an answer to convince everyone.
I grew up and I'm in love with reality.
I stopped entertaining others,
which are just not worth the breath of air it takes to say their name.
and I learned how to live alone without them.
I can't be happy always,
so I started to accept that fact and tried to live according to the way Life takes me.
I believe everything is possible if only I could be Me.
Whatever others think,
I'm not going to bother about that.
well.. this is LIFE!

Someday I'll sleep.

Every night:
I feel & I listen to the same lies I heard before.
I feel the same pain.
I always wonder why I've to suffer this much.
Nights are so lovely, still I miss the moon in my sky,

Days are endless and nights are sleepless because,

I'm always tensed,

I always think too much about the things I lost,
And I feel the pain of missing.

I'm depressed,
I walk through the memories in my mind

Yes, I lost my destiny,
I've gone blind now.
I started to accept darkness.
I hold my feelings in.
Nothing to lose..
Nothing to gain


I'm going to stop all these,
I need freedom from those thoughts,
I want to forget everything,
All I want is to sleep peacefully.
No one to disturb, ONLY ME!!!

100 facts about me!!

                                 Me, Myself and My world :)

1. I'm useless, fool, slightly Nutty & innocent.

2. I hate people who believes that they are perfect.

3. My favorite color is Pink.

4. I love those peoples who makes me smile, even if i don't want to.

5. I can live alone.

6. I have few best friends

7. I trust no one, expect God.

8. I love cricket.

9. I'm right even if you thinks I'm wrong.

10. Because of John Cena, I got to know what attitude means.

11. I don't care for others feelings.

12. I hate others opinions.

13. I hate lies & I hate lairs.

14. I love silent girls.

15. I don't care what others think about me.

16. I hate promoting stupidity

17. I always wanted one special person to share everything.

18. I'm bad.

19. I hate failures. But i love to learn my mistakes from that.

20. I get blamed for everything i do.

21. I dream about the things which won't happen.

22. I love boobs.

23. I love to keep distance from everyone.

24. I love someone deeply, & i can't live without her.

25. I always believed that i can do anything without others help.

26. I love to ride alone.

27. I acts like a fool every time. Till now I'm successful.

28. I study at the nights before exams.I write exams for only pass marks.

29. I hate idiots who think studies is everything.

30. I secretly hate my life, so much. But i don't let anyone else know.

31. I don't have to be in a relationship to prove I'm happy.

32. For me, what i feels is more important.

33. I have standards, but i don't want to show it before my friends. If i starts showing, no one can beat me in that.

34. I haven't tried to imitate anyone till now. I love being myself. But i admire some personalities.

35. I find myself thinking about something many times, which is not gonna happen.

36. No one can stop me from smiling if i wanted to smile.

37. I hate promises made by others which they can't accept in their life.

38. Music is in my soul and I'll never let it go ♥

39. I'm lost. Lost in dreams and reality :/

40. I'm not gonna change for anyone, i don't care what people think, because I am me, and proud of it.

41. I hate to be predictable, but i don't give a shit.

42. I read others mind quickly.

43. I don't know how to maintain a relationship.

44. Me only responsible for what i say, not what you understand :/ :/

45. I believe silence is the best reply for anything.

46. I miss my school life.

47. I always wished to die, rather than living like this.

48. I smoke, but I'm not addicted to that.

49. I love to sleep & I'm its the only time i live without disturbing others.

50. I love those people who talks bad about me & making me the center of their world.

51. I say jokes even when I'm sad.

52. I always tried to make others happy. But I didn't tried to impress anyone.

53. I wanted to become an engineer till i joined college.

54. I hate to wake up early.

55. For me, Sachin is god & i hate those fucks who says bad about my god.

56. I make mistakes, because life doesn't gives me an instruction manual.

57. College spoiled my dreams :|

58. I get hungry in the middle of nights.

59. I hate sleeping with lights ON & fan OFF.

60. I bath naked.

61. I was shy till 11th standard.

62. I feel bad using foul languages when I'm young. Later i learned its better to use & it can represent my feelings to others.

63. I'm hygienic & i hate dirty people.

64. I'm possessive about some one.

65. I miss my old days reading 'balarama' :D

66. I've been hurted many times. But life taught me not to give up on anything.

67. I sleep with my eyes closed & mobiles nearer to me.

68. I hate waiting for everything. Slow & steady may win the race. But i don't believe in that theory.

69. I refused to give up on many occasions.

70. I love to tease idiots!

71. I hate gays x-( & i love lesbians ♥ :p

72. I don't like advices from others. It's my life & I know how to live.

73. I have lost so many 'so called' friends due to my attitude. Still i don't want to change. Love me or hate me. I simply don't give a fuck!

74. I always love letting others to go away from me. I hate them when they go away & i don't want them back in my life.

75. Once i hate some one, i hate them till my death. No matter what they are. This is me.

76. I always wanted to die, but i fear death.

77. I never tried to clear others doubts on me.

78. I love my Mom more than anything.

79. I fight with my brother all time. But still i love him.

80. I love my dad! Am lucky to get such a loving dad ♥

81. Tea. The first thing i wanted in the morning.

82. Money. Hmm. I don't know how to save it. I spend too much.

83. I hate being ignored by someone whom i really loves so much.

84. I treat my haters as non living things and I don't think about their existence.

85. I don't try to judge others, but I value them on some basis.

86. I believe everyone is talented & we can't call them as useless.

87. I love walking in rain, because no sees me crying.

88. I haven't cried for anyone/anything since 2007, except one day in 2009 & that was my birthday. I still thank someone for that :/

89. I know what's attitude is. If you've attitude, please put it in your pocket.

90. I hate trying & I laugh at those people who try too much and ends up in nothing.

91. I know 3 languages very well till 2009. Now I'm not confident in that :|

92. I love playing music loud. Its the only time I forgot my pains.

93. I prefer twitter than facebook.

94. I always believe in saying less & doing more. 

95. Sometimes I'm really rude. I say what i feel, it may be bad for others. Still i don't care.

96. I wish life should have an 'escape, block & delete' button :|

97. P.S: I Love You.

98. I hate love stories.

99. I don't want anyone in my life who doesn't even tries to know me. But i need a friend who can stay with me, even if my mood changes. I think, i got some one.

100. I am what I'm and that's what you never can't be. I'm different and their is nobody like me.

 #100factsaboutme!!!!!

<<<   these are 100 random facts about me. And I've used red color in some only because that's damn true :) By the way I know I'm special :P

There Is Nothing Left To Say.

I have my own opinions. If you don't like it, it's not my fault. 

I'm me and I cant change my ways. 

I can't live up to your expectations .

All you have to do is listen to me. 

Accept what you like and leave the rest. 

If I need your opinion I will ask for that.

I just don't care about your feelings.

I rule my life & I don't want any masters to teach me.

I always act like a fool in front of others. 

I may irritate you, because i like teasing idiots. 

I say jokes, sometimes it may hurt you. But that's not intentional.

I'm someone who hates peoples who gets in to my nerves. 

I hates everyone except I , ME & MYSELF.

I never want to promote others foolishness. 

I'm not born to to please you. I have my standards. They may be low, but I have them.

I got at least someone to support me. 

That's why I'm not keen in responding to those who speaks behind my back. 

But don't take me as a coward. You only know the things which I have done & shown in front of you. I got another phase and that might kill you.

I'm only me. That is all I can be.

I'm only me. That is all I can be. 

No more, no less, don't second guess. 

I love, I live, I laugh, I cry. 

I've wished sometimes that I could die.

Some days I'm funny, others I'm not, 

sometimes I'm in overdrive and I can't stop. 

You may not like me, 

but that's okay because this is me 

and how I'll stay.

I like to keep myself away from others.

 I Always Keep Distance From Others

I've always loved to keep myself away from everyone, not because i hate them, only because i didn't find them useful. I had plenty of "good" friends but few best friends. No one who really knew the real me expect some. Over the past couple years I've let a select few people get to know the real me and i no longer desired to keep my distance. However, after being burned by these people I've once again backed off and become friendly but always from a distance.  I always loves to speak myself and my happiness lies on that.

I think the reason i do this is because, the more i care I'm feared of losing them. This hurted me many times personally. As well as have seen some of the people that mean the most to me be hurt by the people they let get too close. I'm not distrusting of everyone, well OK never mind i am. For me people have to prove to me that i can trust them before i let them get too close. Being this way has made me realize i am missing out on some things but personally I'd rather miss out than get screwed over by someone i thought was my friend.

Memories are all I have left

Afraid of what I see, I struggle to even breathe.
My memories for ever leaving a scar on me,
making me drop to my knees.
No matter how hard I try,
I feel frail, weak,
and afraid to leave my shell.
Forever falling asleep on a pillow full of tears.
My heart feeling brittle, without fail,
my blood leaving a trail.
I scream out, Will any one save me from myself,
or will I have to continue to fall?'

Falling into the depth of my mind,
swallowed by those ghoulies of my memories,
afraid to even try to fight back.
I can hear the inconsistent laughter of these demons in my brain,
rumbling through my head like a speeding train.

No matter how much I cry,
I will never let you see a tear streak down my cheek.
I at least am not weak enough to let you see me,
at my breakdowns peak.
After a while of tear streaked pain,
I let it be, knowing that I can't

Whatever you do, you're Right

In a world of comparison and conformity, 

make your own statement.

Honor your own truth. 

Have the courage to be yourself; 

risk speaking your own thoughts 

and claiming your emotions.

Share your vulnerabilities,

tears, doubts, 

and insecurities; 

let others experience the real you.

Have the courage to be yourself 

and realize that you are a wonderful person.

How to Make a girl Happy ??

It's not at all difficult to make a girl Happy.....

A man ONLY needs to be :

1.a friend

2.companion

3.lover

4.chef

5.electrician

6.carpenter

7.plumber

8.mechanic

9.decorator

10.stylist

11.driver

12.psychologist

14.pest exterminator

15.psychiatrist

16.healer

.

.

.

.

32.good listener

33.organizer

34.good father

35.very clean

36.sympathetic

37.athletic

38.warm

39.Cold

54.courageous

55.determined

56.true

57.dependable

58.passionate

59.compasionate

60.Caring

.

.

WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:

75.give her compliments regularly

76.take her for shopping

77.be honest

78.be very rich

79.not stress her out

80.not look at other girls

81.remember birthdays & anniversary and a little more

So Easy huhh!!!

;-)

Be youself!

People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. 

People talk about how great love is, but that's bullshit.

Love hurts.

 

Feelings are disturbing.

People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. 

How can they deal with love if they're afraid to feel?

Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain.

But they're wrong.

Pain is something to carry, like a radio. 

You feel your strength in the experience of pain.

It's all in how you carry it.

That's what matters. 

Pain is a feeling. 

Your feelings are a part of you. 

Your own reality. 

If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you're letting society destroy your reality. 

You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.

You are the beautiful Cloud Floating in the Sky of My Dreams ...

You are the beautiful cloud floating in the sky of my dreams.
I paint you and fashion you ever with my love longings.
You are my own, my own, Dweller in my endless dreams! ♥

- Rabindranath Tagore ( Nobel Laureate Indian Poet)